Important Video:
Build Better Boundaries
in Spite of Your Openness
Do you give away your time, talent, resources, and energy?
Open centers have vulnerabilities and tendencies that can make it difficult to set and hold personal boundaries. Weak boundaries erode our self-esteem and self-worth. This webinar will open your eyes to patterns you’ve adopted that can steal your joy.
Build Better Boundaries
in Spite of Your Openness
Do you give away your time, talent, resources, and energy?
Open centers have vulnerabilities and tendencies that can make it difficult to set and hold personal boundaries. Weak boundaries erode our self-esteem and self-worth. This webinar will open your eyes to patterns you’ve adopted that can steal your joy.
Stop Paying the Price of Being TOO Nice!
This is the enrollment page for
"Boundary Breakthroughs 4 Life Mastery"
A coaching program for folks who are sensitive and empathic,
and who pay a high price for being nicer than almost everyone else!
This is the enrollment page for
"Boundary Breakthroughs 4 Life Mastery"
A coaching program for folks who are sensitive and empathic,
and who pay a high price for being nicer than almost everyone else!
Here are a just few things we will cover in this course:
Here are a few of the tools, tricks, and techniques we will use:
- How your boundaries help or hinder you.
- Identify your self-inflicted boundary infractions and how they limit you.
- Identify boundary infractions imposed on you by others.
- Setting up internal RED FLAGS when boundary infractions occur .... so you interrupt your automatic reaction ... and instead 'go-to' your REHEARSED conscious response ... AND STAY THERE.
- Preparing and practicing alternative responses to infractions.
- Break the "Attack-Victim-Rescue" drama-triad
- How to use classic negotiating skills to get what you want instead of giving away the farm.
- Pre-faming difficult conversations to take control anticipated confrontations.
- Meeting resistance with Love and embracing the lesson without feeling like a failure.
- Tools to cut through the Gorgon knot of co-dependency.
- Ending enmeshment with the powerful personalities in your life
- How to retrain yourself how to treat you and increase your self-love.
- How to retrain others how to treat you and increase your self-respect.
Here are a few of the tools, tricks, and techniques we will use:
- EFT, NLP, Time Line Healing, Energy Editing, Emotional Coding, and more ...
- Spiritual Principles to strengthen your spine when you're feeling wobbly
- Spiritual Mind Treatments and Meditation MP3s
- Inspiring and empowering music to hum for courage.
At note to Reflectors.
I know. I know. You need that 28-day decision-making cycle.
Since I've been talking about this boundary coaching program for some time,
I know that some of you have already decided to sign-up. You can do that now.
The course starts when you enroll when I send you...
- My eBook "Assertiveness for the Non-Assertive."
- The "How Life Is Now" assessment worksheet to prime your head and heart for the work ahead of you.
- The link to "Creating Healthy Personal Boundaries In Spite of Your Openness." This is a 60-minute video of my workshop for Karen Curry's Quantum Alignment Show. It includes background information about conditioning and how we form our boundaries. Our first session will review this material.
- Give yourself a few weeks for this assignment. Commit to your own self-interest. This is your life.
“Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness.
Concerning all acts of initiative and creation, there is one elementary truth the ignorance of which
kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one's favor all manner of unforeseen incidents, meetings and material assistance, which no man could have dreamed would have come his way. Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it.
Boldness has genius, power and magic in it. Begin it now.”
― William Hutchison Murray
Concerning all acts of initiative and creation, there is one elementary truth the ignorance of which
kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one's favor all manner of unforeseen incidents, meetings and material assistance, which no man could have dreamed would have come his way. Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it.
Boldness has genius, power and magic in it. Begin it now.”
― William Hutchison Murray
Expect push back! As soon as you commit to this work your brain will try to take over with all your logical reasons and excuses, all your avoidance and resistance patterns with appear and scare the hell out of you. These REASONS AND EXCUSES have been with you for much of your life
and they think they own you. They don't. They are just RENTING SPACE IN YOUR HEAD!
Don't panic. Welcome this push back! It is your ego trying to avoid discomfort of change. Be willing to feel uncomfortable for a while ... it will pass. You are reframing your story to one that empowers you and states that "I am no longer willing to settle."
and they think they own you. They don't. They are just RENTING SPACE IN YOUR HEAD!
Don't panic. Welcome this push back! It is your ego trying to avoid discomfort of change. Be willing to feel uncomfortable for a while ... it will pass. You are reframing your story to one that empowers you and states that "I am no longer willing to settle."
These are the shortcuts I wish I'd had 30 years ago!
Before you decline this life-changing opportunity - think about about this:
What is YOUR REAL-LIFE COST
of allowing boundary infractions to limit you?
Will not being able to say "NO" to salespeople COST YOU MONEY?
Oh yeah! Salespeople feel you coming. They have antenna to detect your desire to please them. They zap you with their enthusiasm and you begin to think "I can do this too." You feel their success! Plus you don't want to hurt their feelings, so you sign up for time-shares, vacation plans, real-estate flipping systems, automatic trading platforms, and "How-To" courses for just about everything. You feel like you can be just as successful as they are.. so you sign up! You don't want to hurt their feelings, so you sign up! After they gave you so much of their valuable time, you owe them something, don't you? So you sign up! How much money have you spent because it seemed like a good idea at the time, and then felt too ashamed or guilty to admit buyer's remorse and try to get your money back even you never even did the program, booked the time-share, or set up any of those money-making platforms? But you still owe the money on your credit card, don't you? Just asking.
Will continuing to allow boundary infractions ROB YOU OF YOUR SELF-WORTH?
Most likely. As long as you are trapped in the cycle of doing whatever it takes to make other people feel better,you will continue to give away your time, energy, and resources. And every time you take another one of those hits, another piece of your self-worth crumbles into dust. And you feel such disappointment in yourself, because you fell into that trap again! Dang it!
Will continuing to allow your boundaries to be invaded ERODE YOUR SELF-CONFIDENCE?
Definitely. Not thinking well of yourself costs you everything. Self-judgement usually stems from some baseless fear and the scariest fear is the fear with no name. In my coaching using Human Design we name those fears - we call those suckers out, we call them lies, and then we vaporize them! Those fears will pop up again and again, but they will no longer be able to terroize you into disappearing. You've got their name now and they are in your power.
Will setting boundaries make PEOPLE STOP LIKING YOU?
Maybe. Imagine that you are a slice of pepperoni pizza. Some people like pepperoni. Others prefer ham and pineapple. Others just want to hang out with the cheese pizza crowd. Not everyone is going to like pepperoni! And not everyone is going to like you. That is not a reason to try to become cheese, or ham or pineapple, or whatever the special is that day! If setting a boundary around how you show up in the world - around how much time or money you give away - causes people to stop liking you ... well then ... what does that tell you? Maybe they liked you only because you gave them your time and money. They won't want you to change. If its your boss or your partner, then you'll want to tread carefully until you can retrain them. But the change begins with YOU being willing to have a few people like you (and your time and your money) just a little less.
Will continuing to allow boundary infractions WASTE YOUR TIME ON EARTH?
It could. Think about this: You volunteered to be here.
Out of the billions of souls that applied to join the Earth Experiment, you made the cut.
There are more Lightworkers on the planet now than have ever been before.
And you are one of them!
There is no price higher than the cost of smothering your soul.
There is no ceiling to the price of a wasted lifetime.
You have something important to contribute to the evolution of the human species.
You can only do that if you show up as your whole self.
That means owning your worth, claiming your power, and sharing your gifts.
We are the ones we have been waiting for.
It is time to accelerate our evolution to meet the world we are creating!
I believe we have a Divine Appointment.
Maybe I've done a Human Design body chart reading, or maybe we've just traded emails about your questions, or perhaps we've met on my Facebook Reflectors 88 Circle.
I know you are an incredible expression of the Divine in human form.
The world needs you operating at full power!
The world pays a price when you do not realize your unlimited potential.
The world is changing - one person at a time.
Please don't be afraid to show up and share your light. Fear is only some unknown idea that you've allowed to rent space in your brain. Most fears are really illusions of some imagined pain.
Learning to protect yourself from the invasive energies of others - learning to protect your own value with firm boundaries to contain your power - these are skills you can learn.
And Boundary Transformation 4 Life Mastery is a terrific place to start building those boundaries!
Sign up and start changing the world - one person at a time.
Before you decline this life-changing opportunity - think about about this:
What is YOUR REAL-LIFE COST
of allowing boundary infractions to limit you?
Will not being able to say "NO" to salespeople COST YOU MONEY?
Oh yeah! Salespeople feel you coming. They have antenna to detect your desire to please them. They zap you with their enthusiasm and you begin to think "I can do this too." You feel their success! Plus you don't want to hurt their feelings, so you sign up for time-shares, vacation plans, real-estate flipping systems, automatic trading platforms, and "How-To" courses for just about everything. You feel like you can be just as successful as they are.. so you sign up! You don't want to hurt their feelings, so you sign up! After they gave you so much of their valuable time, you owe them something, don't you? So you sign up! How much money have you spent because it seemed like a good idea at the time, and then felt too ashamed or guilty to admit buyer's remorse and try to get your money back even you never even did the program, booked the time-share, or set up any of those money-making platforms? But you still owe the money on your credit card, don't you? Just asking.
Will continuing to allow boundary infractions ROB YOU OF YOUR SELF-WORTH?
Most likely. As long as you are trapped in the cycle of doing whatever it takes to make other people feel better,you will continue to give away your time, energy, and resources. And every time you take another one of those hits, another piece of your self-worth crumbles into dust. And you feel such disappointment in yourself, because you fell into that trap again! Dang it!
Will continuing to allow your boundaries to be invaded ERODE YOUR SELF-CONFIDENCE?
Definitely. Not thinking well of yourself costs you everything. Self-judgement usually stems from some baseless fear and the scariest fear is the fear with no name. In my coaching using Human Design we name those fears - we call those suckers out, we call them lies, and then we vaporize them! Those fears will pop up again and again, but they will no longer be able to terroize you into disappearing. You've got their name now and they are in your power.
Will setting boundaries make PEOPLE STOP LIKING YOU?
Maybe. Imagine that you are a slice of pepperoni pizza. Some people like pepperoni. Others prefer ham and pineapple. Others just want to hang out with the cheese pizza crowd. Not everyone is going to like pepperoni! And not everyone is going to like you. That is not a reason to try to become cheese, or ham or pineapple, or whatever the special is that day! If setting a boundary around how you show up in the world - around how much time or money you give away - causes people to stop liking you ... well then ... what does that tell you? Maybe they liked you only because you gave them your time and money. They won't want you to change. If its your boss or your partner, then you'll want to tread carefully until you can retrain them. But the change begins with YOU being willing to have a few people like you (and your time and your money) just a little less.
Will continuing to allow boundary infractions WASTE YOUR TIME ON EARTH?
It could. Think about this: You volunteered to be here.
Out of the billions of souls that applied to join the Earth Experiment, you made the cut.
There are more Lightworkers on the planet now than have ever been before.
And you are one of them!
There is no price higher than the cost of smothering your soul.
There is no ceiling to the price of a wasted lifetime.
You have something important to contribute to the evolution of the human species.
You can only do that if you show up as your whole self.
That means owning your worth, claiming your power, and sharing your gifts.
We are the ones we have been waiting for.
It is time to accelerate our evolution to meet the world we are creating!
I believe we have a Divine Appointment.
Maybe I've done a Human Design body chart reading, or maybe we've just traded emails about your questions, or perhaps we've met on my Facebook Reflectors 88 Circle.
I know you are an incredible expression of the Divine in human form.
The world needs you operating at full power!
The world pays a price when you do not realize your unlimited potential.
The world is changing - one person at a time.
Please don't be afraid to show up and share your light. Fear is only some unknown idea that you've allowed to rent space in your brain. Most fears are really illusions of some imagined pain.
Learning to protect yourself from the invasive energies of others - learning to protect your own value with firm boundaries to contain your power - these are skills you can learn.
And Boundary Transformation 4 Life Mastery is a terrific place to start building those boundaries!
Sign up and start changing the world - one person at a time.
That's it. That's my spiel.
Enroll or not. The right people will fill my seats. This is known.
I attracted you because you are ready to show up. You are still reading this because you really want to change; your soul certainly wants to come out and play bigger. But your human brain still needs one more convincing argument or testimonial, it needs to research one more self-improvement course, it needs to wait for a better time - after the remodel is done, after the kids graduate. Yada, yada, yada.
WHAT YOUR BRAIN WANTS IS TOOLS!
I'll give you tools! Your brain needs to think it is in charge, so we will leverage that desire and give it stuff to do!
With this course you will have results.
In your journal you will be documenting those results.
You will have EVIDENCE that you are greater than your conditioning.
You will have more trust in yourself and in your worth.
You will understand and honor the importance of your unique contribution.
You will accelerate your evolution so you can get on with the work you came here to do.
Enroll or not. The right people will fill my seats. This is known.
I attracted you because you are ready to show up. You are still reading this because you really want to change; your soul certainly wants to come out and play bigger. But your human brain still needs one more convincing argument or testimonial, it needs to research one more self-improvement course, it needs to wait for a better time - after the remodel is done, after the kids graduate. Yada, yada, yada.
WHAT YOUR BRAIN WANTS IS TOOLS!
I'll give you tools! Your brain needs to think it is in charge, so we will leverage that desire and give it stuff to do!
With this course you will have results.
In your journal you will be documenting those results.
You will have EVIDENCE that you are greater than your conditioning.
You will have more trust in yourself and in your worth.
You will understand and honor the importance of your unique contribution.
You will accelerate your evolution so you can get on with the work you came here to do.
Still hesitating? I understand. I reeeeaaaallllly do understand.
The possibility of change can paralyze some of us.
Your brain justifies your delays and oscillations.
It plays a tape loop of "Should I? Shouldn't I?"
Your brain will play this game until you stop breathing. When that last breathe leaves your body.... will you look back and ask, "When did I stop believing in myself. When did I stop loving me?"
No THING is worse than wasting the life you have right now.
I was 64 years old when I discovered Human Design and woke up to my Reflector Nature.
I wept. I shook in my shoes. I got mad and threw things!
Then I sat very still and realized that I was not broken.
I realized that I all my wide open energy centers were my SUPER POWER!
I had not understood that with such porous boundaries, I was easily swayed by outside influences, easily manipulated into giving away my power and resources. I had not understood my need to make other people feel better by supporting their goals while postponing my own. And I looked back at some of my major life decisions and saw the horrific prices I had paid for not understanding!
I do not want that to be your experience. I do not want you to have to pay those kinds of life prices.
I studied Human Design. I learned to value the lessons I came to master. I studied patterns of boundary infractions, tested empowering tools, and and practiced skills in order to build my own boundaries. I retrained myself how to treat me. I began to train others how to treat me.
I love how Human Design helped me unravel the chaotic muddle of my cross-threaded boundary infractions. This system helps to systematically isolate specific tendencies that lead to boundary infractions.
In my "Boundary Transformation 4 Life Mastery" coaching program, I use Human Design to identify these traits and tendencies, to see how they can either sabotage or supported us. Once we isolate and name your patterns and boundary infractions, you can learn new patterns to create a life that works better for you.
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Hmmm... Still not sure if this is your next step? Maybe you will never be ready. Maybe you will never find the right time. Maybe everyone else's' dreams will always be more important than yours. Maybe you just need to "SPLAT!" FALL DOWN ONE MORE TIME and PAY A FEW MORE LIFE PRICES... ... before you finally say, "ENOUGH!" You are not being selfish when you claim your self-interest! You are claiming your personal power and creating personal boundaries to support you in doing the work you're here to do. Remember, you volunteered to be here. Out of the billions of souls who applied for an Earth suit, you you made the cut! You are Pre-Approved for this life. It's time to show up! |
When you enroll I will send you a link to access my video "Creating Healthy Personal Boundaries in Spite of Your Openness," my "Assertiveness for Non-Assertive People" eBook, and your first assignment.
I look forward to playing with you and watching you bloom into the self-assured, and truly empowered human you are meant to be. It's time to show up! Sending you Blessings now! Leslie vanWinkle, Reflector 4/6 Profile Fellow Lightworker 
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